I hope what I write about life touches you in some way. I hope that what I go through helps you live life a little bit easier. I hope the words written here helps change something for the better. Read on, dear friends. Read on, and help me like I hope I help you.

Monday, 17 December 2012

[I throw my armor down and leave the battleground for the final time now. I, I, I know I’m running from a warzone. –THE WANTED]

I mean, is it bad enough that my parents are all over my case about whatever bullshit they feel the need is okay to get all over my ass for? I guess they don't think it's enough, because they are bitching at my about having shit on my floor (I mean, seriously, what 20 year old doesn't have shit on their floor?), about not working enough hours (and that's my fault, how?), about how my mom wants the house fricking perfect as hell, and that she doesn't care if we get "wrapped around a tree", as long as her house is fucking perfect (which basically means she doesn't care if we die, as long as the house is clean.). And forgive my language, but I think that this bullshit merits some foul language. I just think that it's bullshit. My mother (my own flesh and blood), called me a do nothing sack of shit who doesn't care about anything. But here's the thing: I went grocery shopping for her yesterday morning, I cleaned the kitchen and made sure her house was ready for our family Christmas gathering yesterday (okay, well, I wasn't the only one doing shit, but still…). And she then goes on to complain that I don't have any money for anything. Uh, okay, and now I wonder why half the time I have no cash in the bank. I know a lot of the time it is because I just spend it all on shit that I don't need. But when she is asking me to do her grocery shopping with my money, it gets kind of really aggravating. Like, what am I supposed to do, tell her no, I can't because I don't have any money to spend on her shit?

Whatever, I'm just done with the fucking bullshit. I just wish that she (well, they, because both my parents are assholes half the time, it feels like) realizes that she isn't the only one affected in this whole thing. I mean, I understand where she is coming from. But my whole thing is that my parents don't live in their children's rooms at all, let alone on a regular basis. I mean, yeah, my dad shares closet space with me and my brother (which I totally don't get, mind you, it boggles my mind), but even then, he's only in our rooms a couple times a week. If ever. It's not like he lives and sleeps in my room. He's not the one who sees it every day. I mean, seriously.

Like I said, what-the-fuck-ever. I am just so sick of the drama and bullshit in this house. It drives me nuts. I'm not even kidding when I say that I'm just ready for the world to end (which, mind you is supposed to be four days from now. Well, we'll see, because we survived Y2K, swine flu, mad cow disease, bird flu, 9/11 and other bullshit like that.). And that is kind of saying something.

Okay, I am done ranting. Until something else like this happens, which is more likely to happen than not. Like, seriously, I'm not even going to bet on the fact.

So, anyhow.

I'm working, I'm writing, I'm trying to live life. Which is kind of hard because my parents want me to live the life they want me to live and not the life that I want to live. It sucks, but what can I do about it? In my mom's words, "When you live under my roof, you live by my rules." Whoever came up with that saying is kind of an ass. I feel like it's the battle cry for parents everywhere. I am just saying. But I said I was done ranting.

I am writing a Beauty and the Beast-esque book. Let's see if this one can actually get finished, huh? But this book is from the girl's point of view, instead of the beast's (or guy's) point of view. I just thought that it would be interesting because I haven't read or seen a Beauty in the Beast type story in that view yet. And I think it would be cool to get into the girl's head for a change, rather than the guy's side of the story. This way, you can see the guy's transformation, but you can also see what the girl is going through, in a more in-depth way. At least, that is how I am thinking of it as. Or maybe it's just another Beauty and the Beast book. I just don't know. As far as I am in the book, there is not much content and not much going on yet. Well, damn. I thought it'd be good by now. Haha, whatever. It will be, when I am finally done with it. I hope, anyways.

Anyways, I think I am done writing for tonight. I am tired and I am going to watch a movie before bed. At least, attempt to. I don't know how far I am going to get into the movie to actually call it watching the movie. But who knows?

Goodnight, guys.



  1. Charly, I am so sorry to hear you are having a difficult time with your parents... I think as we grow older we tend to forget what it was like to be young, I on the other hand fight aging every step of the way, lol.

  2. Launna,
    I think it will be okay. I just want to get through the Christmas season (what with Christmas being a week away) and through New Year's, and hopefully, things will get a little bit better. This time of year is always the most stressful (I have no idea why it is, it just is; and here I am, thinking it's supposed to be the *happiest* time of the year... Yeeesh).
    Anyway, like I said, things should be getting better as the season goes on.